Nekodra K.D. LaCroix's Stories & Art Blog

"Our Milky Way Galaxy is but an atom of dust in an endless mansion, that in all of existence, has never been dusted." -Nekodra K.D. LaCroix


Showing posts with label Dreams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dreams. Show all posts

Friday, January 18, 2013

To Dreams, Guts and Bucketlist

What do you want to be when you grow up?
I wanna be a vampire!--- in a movie

I was thinking today about what I used to always say in school when your teacher asks, what do you want to be when you grow up? I traded off between Actress and Writer. I technically succeeded in one, Writing. I did self publish on Amazon, WOVaN: Short Stories vol.1. Its only been out for a little over a month and I know who bought 5 of the 6 copies sold. That is okay, woot there is someone out there who I don't know that bought a copy, that is amazing to me. But what always still sits in the back of my mind, acting. Its not that I want to be a big star or anything, I don't really, I just want to be there. Just a small role, just to experience it all and have fun.

I was in a play in middle school, Annie. It was so much fun. I was only a orphan and had like two lines, not counting the musical numbers of course. I didn't care, it was fun. Insanely fun. I also did a video for a class in high school, where I got to play Hades. It was awesome, which I have shown a clip of and that is all that remains of the fun we had. We gave a copy to the teacher, who when I got a hold of him last I heard he wasn't teaching anymore and didn't know where those boxes are that has all that stuff. He said he'd look, but I never heard back from him, and what was on a friends computer was lost to the ether. But for this single clip of outtakes. But that was fun.

Here is the clip again if your curious, lol. It really is just a silly short clip of outtakes. I really wish the whole video hadn't been lost. There are a few other outtakes posted on youtube too.

I have to ask myself why? Why can't I get the guts to go out and pursue this other dream? Its not that I want to be the star. I just want to be there. I am more then content to be an extra, a small role who more in the background.

One: I don't think I would audition well I get so nervous so easily.
Two: to be honest I don't know how the hell to go about looking for chances to just play an extra in a movie. lol.

Well, part of my reason for writing. A little secret to what really drives me to write, the hopes that maybe, just maybe someday down the road someone- somewhere will want to turn one of my books into a movie. Maybe I could convince them to let me play one of the minor vampire roles.

I will keep my fingers crossed.

If I had a official bucket list:

1. Play a Vampire in a movie/show
2. Travel to just any and everywhere I get the chance to
3. Go see SNL live (meeting the cast would be an awesome bonus, lol)
4. Never stop dreaming
5. Keep writing and publishing my stories
6. Play an extra in a movie
7. Don't give up

I suppose now I do have an official bucket list, though can I do that? Put some like never stop dreaming and never give up? Eh, who cares its my bucket list right? That feels right, that sounds right for me. Those are my life goals.

Onto Writing

On some other notes, I have been working on AVRC which is just a short easily way to say A Vampire Romantic Comedy, which I have a possible better name to call it other then by its genre, but still thinking about it. For now I will just stick with the nickname AVRC.

Though I am taking a break from working on it today, because I am stressing myself out a little. I mentioned earlier on twitter that the more I work on AVRC, the more disappointed I get in the lack of comedy that I want there to be. I love comedy, I love to laugh- I suck at cracking a joke. I am the Laughter not the Comedian. I wasn't joking when I also stated I wish to collaborate with Seth Meyers. He is the head writer at SNL and from interviews I have seen, its been said he is fun to collaborate with. I want AVRC to be a movie on day and there is a character I wrote for Seth in AvRC. How awesome would that be to collaborate the script with him and then also work with him should it actually be made into a movie? I also mention or Rick Gualtieri, because he also really funny. I absolutely love Bill the Vampire and the rest of the books in the series (eagerly waiting for the next). I am sure I got weird looks whenever I would read in public because I couldn't help but burst out laughing, and I was at least chuckling quietly to myself on every page.

Personal Life and Pets

Mellie Lane
Also pets, I have gotten some new pets since the last time I really made any actual posts. So here are some adorable pictures to share of my two kittens and Chinese water dragon.

JarJar Binks
My kittens were born May 7th 2012. There is Mellie Lane and JarJar Binks, yes as in Star Wars. He is orange and does not shut up, always talking. Seemed to fit, lol.

 They used to be so small, they already are pretty big now, just 8 months old and they are so big compared to how small they were at just a few months. Though Mellie is still pretty small and quite a trouble maker. For those who know SNL, we have gotten to calling her Gilly when scolding her. As in Gilly from SNL played by Kristen Wiig. lol, it amuses us.
My Chinese water dragon, birth is unknown other then a few months, so we decided to just go with Oct. 31st just because. His/her (won't know till about a year old) name is Jade. We have just gotten to referring to Jade as male. He is pretty cute and currently small, but he could grow to be 2-3 ft! In some cases Chinese Water Dragons can get to be 4ft! Crazy.

Its so funny, Mellie is obsessed with watching Jade, determined to try and get in the tank. She hasn't been successful. Its so funny, she paces around the tank, looks at it from every angle. Mellie is the hunter of the two. Which Mellie and JarJar are brother and sister. If I spot a spider and point it out to Mellie, she will eat if for me. lol.


Movies:
Image found on Google
Well if you follow me on twitter @Nekodra then you know I have been all over the movie I Kissed a Vampire. Its a vampire musical! How awesome is that? I saw that and I thought I have to see this and I loved it. Absolutely loved it. I now have the soundtrack as well. If you enjoy Vampires and Musicals, you should check it out. Its on Netflix, iTunes and I am sure other places.

I love that now I have music to listen to that is about vampires. I love it! My top favorite songs would have to be 'Little Peck' and 'Just a Drop'. The movie is a bit silly which is what makes it awesome and the music is so fun. Dylan and Sarah are an adorable couple, I love it. I don't want to spoil it, so I won't say too much more, but I loved it. All of it. It has joined my list of top favorite vampire movies, next to Interview with a Vampire, Cirque Du Freak, Fright Night 2012, Van Helsing,and Dark Shadows. I think that is it for my top favorite ones, and I have to say I almost want to put it as my number one favorite vampire movie, but I feel like I am betraying those I have known for years like Interview with a Vampire, but I don't know. I really loved I Kissed a Vampire.

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Okay, think I have ramble on long enough. If you enjoy vampires, please take a look at my collection of vampire short stories on amazon. WOVaN: Short Stories vol.1

~Nekodra K.D. LaCroix
Nekodra-blog@hotmail.com
@Nekodra

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Ohh We're Halfway there- Ooh Living on a-

Doodled yesterday/today, it was super fun. ^_^ I like it

Modern Day Magic:
YES! Over 20,000 words. I feel accomplished. 21,543 to be exact. I have a few new 'scene' ideas. I expanded on chapter 2, which I also made a decision about the detective. So Chapter 2 is coming along nicely now. The next thing is when I visit my boyfriend from the 13th-20th, I plan to play some Magic and use that 'battle' for a scene between Danny and Ember. So we'll let the fates decide who wins, aka he will kick my ass. >.< But we will see, he plans to make several new decks with his two boxes of Dark Ascension he got, so maybe the one I play against won't do so well against my Human/Spirit Token Shitting deck...maybe. >.> *cough*


So the conversation is moving along once more for Chapter 2. The ball is rolling again with ideas for Modern Day Magic. It feels nice. Still feeling out the characters, I have Ember down pretty well. Still have decisions to make with Cole. Edward is hard to write, because I don't have a brother. Though there aren't really any scenes to write with him yet, but there is a past scene I am working on and its a little hard. I always wanted an older brother, someone who would have stood up for me through grade school, someone who I could have talked to. Someone to have played with. I was a lonely child, well I had my books and Tv Shows. Heh. But still a few big things that need to be figured out, but its coming along. *Bounces* Over 21,000 words! *Plays Bon Jovi's Living on a Prayer* Ooh, better idea:


Only my boyfriend works at Gamestop and I am the one out of a job, but he is what keeps me going. I don't know what I would do without him, his support and love, honestly. I don't even what to think about it. *shivers* I would say that songs fits pretty well for this point in my life.

So Modern Day Magic:
I have plans for holiday chapters, the story starts off in early October. One holiday is pretty-- gruesome, so far at least. And with the magic, of course there is going to be a little Harry Potter tossed in, really, it can't be helped. lol.


Modern Day Magic Sample
The Most recent and last post with actual parts from Modern Day Magic for those who may have not read it and are curious. Please don't steal. lol. ^_^;; If you have opinions, please don't forget to say them. ^_~

Here is the current word count from the last few days:

2/01/12- 18,639
2/02/12- 19,759
2/03/12- 20,161
2/04/12- 20,967
2/05/12- 21,543 - so far today

Yay. I woke up this morning at 10am to my dad calling from Nairobi and I tried going back to sleep and I ended up writing about oh-- 200 words on my phone with ideas before I could pass back out of which I promptly did once my muse let me.


Then I had 4, yes 4, of those dreams where you think you're getting up. Then you suddenly wake up again, only once again you didn't. 4 times. I woke up with a slight headache from that. x.x Man and my boyfriend had bought me a pretty sweet swiss army knife and we were at this strange amusement park that apparently we both use to go to as a child. It was pretty nifty, old and rustic, I may add something like that to the story, it was actually pretty cool looking. Its so strange how dreams tend to re-write your history, fun, but crazy.


One of the times I 'woke up' all the light bulbs had decided to go out in the house and me and my mom had no way of getting more till my dad got back from Africa.


One time, I was at a pretty nifty school with past teachers I liked and I think Harper from Wizards of Waverly place was there. So was Ian from the first season of Doctor Who. I watched several episodes with the 1st Doctor before I went to bed. I admit, small crush on Ian. I was about to buy a Chai Tea latte with white chocolate from the star bucks on campus and I woke up! Gah, of course. I haven't had a Chai tea in so long because I don't have money and my dream couldn't let me at least have a sip before I woke up? No, instead in one of the dreams I ate a raw ball of meat, yes raw ball of meat. It tasted like a flavorless ball of mush. >.< uck.


Then one dream, I was in an art store and apparently wanted to learn to knit, but all the balls of yarn were 100 dollars, the starters kit was 1,000 dollars. I had no money, so I don't even know why I was there. The salesman was trying to get me to buy it all, he wouldn't listen when I told him I only had 6 dollars to my name. He kept showing me things I couldn't have. It was mean. My unconscious can be very torturous a lot of the time. 

Info on the Blog: 
If you haven't noticed, I can be very random with my blog updates and I am sorry for that, but I am just not a consistent person. And that's not going to change, so if you want to know when I make posts, I would either follow me on Twitter or follow by email or follow if you have an account here that way you know quickly and easily when I make a post. Just a little fyi. ^_^;


In case you haven't notice, I went through and put tags on my posts. A suggestion I got from another blogger. Here are some lovely tips from another blogger My Name is Not Bob and his post on 25 Ways to increase blog Traffic. I hope the words I pick work okay... I may have to go through and mess with them more, but I think I picked decent words for lack of better words. ^_^; So now you can see which posts I talk heavily about Psych, Red Dwarf or Doctor Who. Which ones have WOTDS, short stories, and when I talk about Modern Day Magic.

Psych Count Down:
(USA's site from Psych Calender Countdown)

Can't wait! Love you Lassie! And Psych is the only reason I will tune into the superbowl at 5pm on Sunday (aka later today <.<;; ). Just like I recorded White Collar just to watch the other promo, which of course was at the very end. >.< lol, I called that. I also don't know how many times I have watched it, >.> but more then I probably should have.....


Anyways, I think I have yammered on enough for 5:30am >.< I should probably go to bed. lol. But I will probably work on Modern Day Magic a bit more before I do. <.<;;


Night! or Morning!

Here are the side notes:

-- Please Comment, I would love to talk!
Also any tips, suggestions would be loved. 
You can also email me at Nekodra-blog@hotmail.com
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--Follow me on Twitter. I will tweet every time I post on my blog. Nekodra's Twitter 
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--If you have never seen Psych and you love comedies or crime shows, I highly recommend it! Currently on a mid-season break and will return on Leap year, Feb. 29th 2012! 27 more days!
So excited here is a Link to a trailer for the second half of season 6. Here is the new promo. I am so excited, can't wait for 2.29.12!


-- Please remember, Modern Day Magic belongs to me, thank you.

~Nekodra K.D. LaCroix

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Nostalgic Dreams

Forward
See, I told you I couldn't actually stay away for long. lol. I have been working a decent amount on stories, though I was pretty sidetracked by watching Wizards of Waverly Place. Also struggling with feeling like a slight creeper for completely crushing on Justin Vincenzo Pepe Russo (which is waaay too much fun to say) but I am actually a few months older then the actor David Henrie, who plays him and the character does hit 18 at some point, it never mentioned exactly when but once his younger sister said she was 17, then Justin had to be 18 and I think that was in season 3 somewhere, I don't recall exactly. I plan to re-watch the show again. <.<;; *cough*


.....Anyways, while being distracted I have still been working on stories. I have made some decent additions and written a possible ending to Modern Day Revealed, which I have finally renamed and I think I like it, Modern Day Magic. There is still a lot to work on plot wise, but I have how I want it to end and some more scenes, but I am missing all of the middle. >.<# But I will get there. ^_^ I have names now for the characters too, well, I like one of the names- no actually they do both work. So yes, I have names finally. First names at least, still on the fence about last names- Scratch that, I just thought of last names and I think I like them. What do you think of these names:
Cole Henries & Amber (Ember) Rosalin Snow
Her name is Amber, but her friends call her Ember or Em for short.




So I was bored and decided to google my pen name, Nekodra. Mostly just to check and make sure there isn't a website or anyone else using that name. The first few pages (which is all I looked at) its all me, pretty much but for a about 3 and a few where just picking up the Neko part. But while doing so, I found what remains of a project from high school with my friends. Sadly we can't find the whole video, the laptop ate it or something. Sad. I can't believe we didn't make copies aside from the one the teacher kept. I still kick myself about that. I keep toying with going to the high school and seeing if that teacher still works there and if he still has the copy we let him keep, so I can copy it onto my computer. Haven't done it yet >.< I should. But we still have a few bloopers, which my friend had posted to youtube a while back and I had forgotten about it. Here it is, if you want to see me playing Hades. Well a really short blooper reel of me as Hades, there is better stuff in the full video. It was fun and I really wish we had all the video from it. If I do manage to get my hands on it, I will share.


Being a actor looks like so much fun. I love movies/shows, and I love seeing all the behind the scene clips I can get my hands on. Acting was on my list of what I want to be when I grow up for so long, still mostly is, but when it comes down too it, I don't have the guts to really try. ^_^; I was in an Annie play once and I loved it! I really did. I just played a small role as one of the orphans, but it was so much fun! I will never forget it and I would love to be in a play again. I also wish I could go to plays more often. Though I doubt I would get a role or the guts to audition. One day though, I would love to just appear in a movie or show, just once at least. Preferably as a Vampire or a witch, anything supernatural really. ^_^; At least once in my life. I am only 22, there is still hope. Maybe I can write a script and maybe they would let me at least play a character that appears in one scene, like Stephen King does and I think others have too, I just don't recall or just ya know, don't know what they look like. I have already added attempting a script to my list of things I want to write. A week or two ago it crossed my mind I would like try and challenge myself to write a play, now I have another reason for writing a script. In hopes of it getting picked up so I can play a small role if it gets picked to be a movie.


Anyways, I have yammered to you enough. I am working on my stories, and I have edited the first few posts and now I will go write a WOTDS for you, my readers to post with this:


Okay now that the power is back, after being out for an hour or so, I can finish my post and tweek the WOTDS a little more and finish this. Also I just found out from a friends sister who currently attends Snohomish High, x.x she is sure the teacher retired. Gah! noooes, that sucks! I may never get my hands on that video again.


Here is todays WOTDS:
 (Which don't expect much, its...randomish.... and my inspirations are focused on my stories I can't post here, so its hard to write anything else. >.< )

January 15th 2012
WOTDS

Mutative- Indicating a change of place or state
Kumu (Hawaiian)- Tree
Mutare (Latin)- to change, to alter
Ignis (Latin)- Fire
Cupiditas (Latin)- Desire, Longing, Passion


Ignis, Cupiditas, Mutare

Dreams

“What has happened to me?” She stopped in mid-step as it dawn on her, with her head looking to the ground. 

“I need to change again, no not change but become what I once was. What happened to the depressed but bubbly and happy teenager I used to be? Where is my bubble? Those were such great times. Sure it had its lows, but what matters is the over all. I miss it. I miss high school, I miss that life. Sure I was suicidal for a while, okay a long while in high school after what happened, that admittedly still lingers. Though for different reasons. But when I was with my friends I could forget. When I was with my friends I knew what happiness was, what content was. I was myself. I could actually be myself.” A tear slipped down her cheek. 

“Screw the crappy things, screw the depression! I maybe stuck here, but I should enjoy it. It maybe not be my dream, but I have realistic dreams here as well. I should go through with them. I should take in the experiences I get from this world and live.” She leaned against the tree, looking up at the snow covered branches.

“I have let the world harden me. I am like some bitter old man. I have let the loss of the connection to that world get to me. I have become too cynical, too wrapped up in the negative.” She paused again at the realization. 

“I've been away from my friends for too long.” She slowly sank to her knees, ignoring the chill seeping through her pants.

“The loss of my friends. My loves. I may not have actually got to see or talk to some of them that often. But what mattered was I knew they were there. There was so much there. Now, its hard to know. But that shouldn't matter.” Standing up, brushing off the clumps of snow.

“I can't let it bring me down. I will see them again, it maybe a long while. A life time. But I need to bring that spastic bubble back. I love to laugh. I love to be full of energy, so why did I let that slip away. This isn't me. I want to be what I was. I want to enjoy things again, despite how crappy this is, despite the negative, because it will only get worse if that's all I focus on. Thinking negative only leads to more negativity. I have said it before, but I really need to feel it; being positive will lead to good things.” She adjusted her messenger bag that clung to her shoulder.

Determined “I control my bubble of a world, and I need to get back to what I enjoy and I need to love what I enjoy. It may not be how I want it to be, it may not be perfect, but what matters is I enjoy it. I have my thoughts, my own little world and what will have to- no will do for now. Don't focus on what I can't have, but focus on what I can bring to myself.” Looks around nervously. 

“I should also stop talking aloud to myself, people are going to think I am crazy.” Pulling her jacket close around herself, she walked off.

(end)

Page of other WOTDS
Page of other Short Stories




Afterword

Like I said, kinda seems random. A monologue. I hope the emotion comes out, or more the torn bouncing emotion and realization. ya know? Does that make sense? I hope so. ^_^; 

Now that I have internet back, I may pop over and watch more Wizards of Waverly Place, which by the way. I want there to be more, there so easily can be more. >.< But all my research has led to no. But, I can hope, right? ^_^; Heh. 

Here are the side notes:


--Follow me on Twitter, because I will tweet every time I post on my blog and I will post a link. Nekodra's Twitter and remember Sharing is Caring, re-tweet to your friends if they might enjoy this. 

--If you have never seen Psych, and you love comedies or crime shows, I highly recommend it! Currently on a mid-season break and will return on Leap year, Feb. 29th 2012. So excited here is a Link to a trailer for the second half of season 6. Seasons 1-5 are on Netflix. Also, YAY officially confirmed for a 7th season!

--Also if you have never seen Red Dwarf it’s a great British Sci-fi comedy, and a new season after many years will air September 2012 for Red Dwarf X. So excited they are currently filming, can’t wait! Seasons 1-9 on Netflix.

-- Please remember feedback, I can’t grow as a writer from silence.
Any tips, suggestions, would be loved. 
You can also email me at Nekodra-blog@hotmail.com

--Also remember unless stated otherwise, these stories and drawings belong to me, I wrote/drew them, please respect that.

~Nekodra K.D. LaCroix


Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Perception

Forward


So today is one of those days, where you wake up and you can feel, you can tell your perception has shifted. Have you ever had one of those mornings? I think my unconscious was stewing over my post yesterday, because I have been trying/working for years to shift to a more positive way of thinking, and its hard, I have greatly improved but I forget. I get distracted very easily, and so after talking about it reminded my unconscious of what we have been trying to work on. To be honest, I have been depressed probably since I quit my job back in May, but it didn't really sink in, or I didn't really notice till a few months ago. Long story short, the only time I have felt happy over the last few months was when I was watching Psych, which is why I watched it everyday, to get a dose of happy, and because I absolutely love the show. But today I woke up, and I feel better. Things still suck, but that post I made, jolted my perception, into remembering I have control over how I feel, and even though I had been trying to make myself happy and trying to jar myself out of the slump, it never really seems to fully register in my mind, but something jarred it last night and I can only assume it came from reminding myself of my core beliefs, I will have to remember that next time this happens. So I learned something new about myself, and I feel a lot better, and I think this will help so I can actually start working on some new stories instead of posting and poking at old ones. Maybe I can even move past my writers block on my novel. 


Plus, there is now more to look forward to then just tonight's new episode of Psych, which I am super excited for, but also sad because it sounds like this is the last new episode for a while. But also, even though it won't be aired till September, even though it would be ready by summer, but in order to get the views they want, it won't air till Autumn 2012. So far away, but I hope its worth it. Which I should probably said what it is, Red Dwarf X, new Red Dwarf! Super excited for that. I am currently watching the first episode as I type, which I never notice that was the actor who plays Mr. Weasley till just now. But that's off point, I plan to go through and re-watch all of Red Dwarf in excitement for the (despite far off) airing of new Red Dwarf. I can't seem to find anywhere what its going to be about, all I know is what I can been getting through Twitter, which is a few pictures of them holding scripts, and a blog that the actor who plays Kryton has. A video of them doing The Cat and Kyrton's makeup. I am just happy its all the same actors. >.> Although as much as I love Rimmmer, he is a little old for me now. but I still crush for the younger Rimmer. 


Also yesterday after I followed Nathan Fillion on twitter, I remembered that he has a sorta new show, its on its forth season, so not that new. I had seen an episode a while back, and like it, but had forgotten about it. So along with re-watching Red Dwarf, I plan to get into Castle while its on its break till January. Lets see if I can get through 3 seasons and what is aired of season 4 before it starts again. But now I also want to re-watch Firefly. So many things, and I can only do one at a time. But tonight is saved for new Psych. *giddy* and its Timothy Omundson on character chatter tonight, I look forward to that. (turns out he is next week, oops but it was fun getting inside from the writer Tim Meltreger.) Yay, so fun. See there are reasons to be happy, and positive. Also I may have found a new show to add to my top fav list, I am now watching the first episode of Castle, and I am thoroughly enjoying it and this is just the first episode. Whee, funfunfun! Nathan Fillion is awesome, just putting it out there.


Hmm, but what short story should I post today?..... *goes rummaging through stories folder* 

Ooh that fits perfect with the whole perception title. But its half-finished, I will go finish that first. 

But side note, there is one more episode of Psych before the break, which the sneak preview I just watched through the Psych vision app on my iPhone, its got my interest and it looks pretty funny, but I have to wonder. Does something happen to Shawn in tonight's episode? Cause where was Shawn in all this (the trailer for next week) why are the three of them alone for the weekend, I feel something fishy is going on. But I will just have to wait till tonight's episode to see what happens, and then next week to find out about the lack of Shawn. Or maybe that's just the clip, and other clips with have Shawn? I do like how Marlowe was mentioned. I wonder if we will see her again, clearly they are still 'dating'. I will have to post that on the chatter and cross my fingers that it gets answered, my two questions to Maggie weren't answered, but there were a lot, I wasn't expecting it. Hoping, but not expecting, anyways, I am suppose to be working on today's short story to post it.


The Drug of Dreams
by Nekodra K.D. LaCroix

                She woke up dazed and confused. Come On! COME ON! She felt a tug on her arm, and she opened her eyes. She couldn’t recall this place, and then she felt the history wash over her. This was a friend of hers, the one tugging on her arm. They were going to a festival today; a strange circus, an arcade place with rides and shows. She felt the seat belt pull her back, and she unfastened it, still a bit dazed. Her friend, Tamisha, or Tami for short; her long black loose hair covered her view as she stumbled to keep up with her. She turned to look back, Silly, lets hurry or we’ll miss the show! Her vibrant emerald eyes glimmered in the dark of the night air. It made me want to follow, and why not, she’s been my friend of years, ever since I can recall.
                We ran, through the trees, thick mossy trees, vines dangling here and there. Somewhere in the distance I can hear a waterfall. Then it all gave away suddenly, to a clearing of small buildings, of tents, of rides and things to come. And I was alone. I looked around for my friend with the emerald eyes, but she was nowhere to be seen, she had faded away it seemed.
                Drawn, I walked forward, an orange danced before me. There was a large bon fire, with people dancing around it to a music that I can’t hear. The flames are memorizing, they flicker and sway, the embers dancing to the stars. The logs belong, glowing, emanating the heat, breathing the core of the beast. The tamed and the wild orange flickering red.
                Someone comes up from behind me, a voice I recall, but cannot remember. A friend, another friend I have known for as long as I can remember. I can feel his hand rest on my behind, it startles me, but I cannot find a reason to refuse. He pulls me towards him, and we embrace. I feel like I am falling, but with nowhere to land, and I can’t see anything. But I can feel his hand, and I can feel his lips touch mine, it feels wonderful and then I wonder why. He is a good friend, but he loves guys.
                Everything crumbles away, and with a splash I open my eyes. I see another friend, flamed with red hair and short. Running up with a grin adoring his face, he latches on hugging me as those he hasn’t seen me in days. I know I haven’t seen him in days, because I don’t know him, but I do. Known him for years, he could be my twin. I feel he fog, slowly lift. These aren’t my memories, but they are, they are becoming my memories. Overriding, powerful, and why would I refuse, I love him.
                Gunfire, and I jar awake, I feel out of it. I feel blinding pain, but behind a glass wall. I can see the pain, I know it hurts, but I can’t feel it, but I do. Suddenly I am on the ground, I struggle, but I can’t move. Its wet, slick, thick, did I fall in a puddle? No, that doesn’t feel like water. Someone is calling my name, but that’s not my name, but I know it is. My name on the lips of the one I love, soft green eyes, and always raving about his hair. I laugh, at the thought that he loves his hair more then me. I know that’s not true. The ever joker, the eternal boy. He sounds frantic, why, what’s wrong, is he okay? My name, over and over, it starting to sound weird, like when you say a word too many times, or it looks like its spelled wrong, but you know its not, but your convinced it is. You’ve been looking at it too long. Suddenly there are arms around me, why so many hugs tonight? But I like it; I never want this hug to end, then everything is gone.
(end)

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Page of other Short Stories

 Afterword

That was half written a few years ago and half written tonight. Its also really short, sorry, but it seems a good length for what it is. It is also suppose to be disjointed and a little hard to understand, like with dreaming sometimes. Sometimes you can see how foggy and weird, confusing and false a dream is, but yet you can't ignore it and you believe the false history that's give to you. I have never been high on drugs or anything, but from what I have gathered from shows (I know, awesome references <.<;;; ) that I would image it to be something like that. But with dreams you can't help but follow the script, as you tumble down the rabbit hole. Ya' know? I think it was base off a dream I had, and particularly disjointed and as you can see, strange dream. I hope I kept the style up okay as I sort of finished it, I mean it could probably go on longer, but oh well. I hope I was able to pick up that weird writing style again okay, and that you can't tell where the break was. ^_^ Enjoy?


As always, a quick side note before I go off and eagerly await tonight's new episode of Psych, while studying the character chatter with Timothy Omundson once it starts, (I miss read it, turns out Omundson is next weeks character chatter.) and watch some Castle while I wait:

            -Follow me on Twitter, because I will tweet every time I post on my blog and I will post a link.  Nekodra's Twitter and remember Sharing is Caring, retweet to your friends if they might enjoy this.
         -Have fun and toss me writing prompt, I would love the practice. I will credit you for tossing the prompt when I post the resulting story.
         -If you have never seen Psych, and you love comedies or crime shows, I highly recommend it! Psych airs TONIGHT on USA
        - Please remember feedback, I can’t grow as a writer from silence.
        -Also remember unless stated otherwise, these stories and drawings belong to me, I wrote/drew them, please respect that.

                                             ~Nekodra K.D. LaCroix
 



Friday, December 2, 2011

Shadows of Unwavering Blue

Shadows of Unwavering Blue
By Nekodra K.D. LaCroix

Standing tall and unwavering, surrounded by a hill of fallen leaves. The trunk a river of abstract swirls, lines and knots going vertically from tip of the roots to tippy top branch. Embedded and grooved, but smooth, caressing it as you circle leaves your hand feeling soft. Like it frozen in time, petrified but alive. Its silky bark chilling to the touch, yet warmth is embedded deep inside feeling like a beating heart, pulsing against your hand. Speaking centuries, perhaps eons of wisdom, of lives, coming and going in the sweep of time. Touching it has made you wiser, given you strength that was within you all along, energy that is as old as time washing over you, healing and soothing. Like the hug of a beloved parent who has always cared for you and always will, having touched a deep place in your soul.
Looking up, hand still resting on the trunk as though the world could crumble apart if you sever the connection you have made. Security that you almost know will stay with you now that you have it, but you waver unsure and not wanting to risk it. It has wrapped itself around your soul and it’s a feeling of great love that you never want to leave. As you look up at the majestic old tree, noting how there is not a single branch till seven feet up, where it bushes out to shade an uneven wave of a thirteen foot radius. Leaves twist and dance, wiggling free from the top to grace the trunk and blanket the hidden roots. The snow of never ending leaves; tumble down as you reach where you started; having circled the tree as though you have circled it life from seed until it’s never end. The eternal raining of leaves continue to add to the blanket of cushioned ground, soft on the feet bare like feathers of angels. Like the velvet dress caressing your pale skin.
Turning, a single slender swing, a single simplicity hovering barely two feet from a mist of hue pastel blue and deep green leaves. Appearing from the mass of branches like its dropping from a portal to unknown dreams. Placing a hand on the faded brown rope, frazzled and worn; prickles to the touch like soft needles and thorns. Harmless but the pain is still there like a nostalgic memory. Vines have cushioned the hard old boarded seat, having scaled down the other rope. Flowers crawling along the twisting vines, an exotic flower, of pastel purples and ice blue, with warped petals and coiling little vines, like a pumpkins, cork screwed. Each flower that snakes up the rope is unique and distorted in its own ways. 
            The wind picks up briefly, and encircling fog shifts to show a house far in the distance, like a mirage out pass the hilled leaves, then it’s gone again, forgotten like an uncertain spell. The allure to the swing, calling. She touches the rope again, feeling pass the bristles of age. Lifting the thick iridescent blue velvet fabric with her other hand, her right releasing the rope briefly to position away from it, to slide with elegance upon the swing. Her dress further cushioning the vine engulfed wood. In a daze she studies the rope, stroking it, feeling the needles crawl along her pale hand. Feeling the centuries creeping in, like it’s been waiting all this time. The height allowing her to brush the ground giving illusion of floating but still able to caress the ground and know it’s safe. Gently as though the tree is uncertain of the protection, back and forth displacing leaves as her feet sweep pass.
            She looks up, a smile charms her freckled ghostly face, and through a window in the branches, the stars blink in delight back to her. In the charity of the speckled sky an array of stars fly pass as though the world was able to move once more. Time was moving forward as a river brushing pass the shore.
The allusion continues, time sweeps by as she sweeps up leaves with each pass on the swing. Back and forth, like time is trying to keep her safe happy, as though nothing has happened. But time can only move in one direction, and as she sweeps forward again, the world has changed. Houses come and go. Some times peacefully with age, to be rebuild over, sometimes in disaster. Fire engulfs with such anger, other times a storm strikes with such fury. Each different as time evolves, brushing pass in the sweep of the wind, there and gone, then there again.
The fog, trying to keep the dream alive, trying to mask the change in times and each swing back, her house is there just out of reach, beyond the haze. Safe as a dream, as though she could hop off the swing landing in those cushioned leaves and run back to it, to play with her faded toys and sleep in the forgotten bed, hug her buried parents, but the charm of the swing sung by the tree, keeps its hugging melody and time ticks on.   

I just love drawing checkers, its so much fun. ^_^
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Page of other Short Stories

Afterword

This was an assignment for a creative writing class I took, last year I believe. I went through and fixed a few things before posting it. A few iffy spots remain, but I couldn’t think of a better way to say it, I just hope its not confusing or anything. I don’t recall exactly what the requirement was for the assignment was. I think it was something about a single image and describing it in great detail. This image is from a recurring dream I used to have when I was a kid. I added the ghost for assignment purposes to give it a small story of sorts. But the swing and the tree with the blanket of leaves on the fog surrounded hill are from the dream. Its still a very vivid memory. Its so peaceful. It now serves now as a good way to relax, though sometimes I forget about it, its one of 3 or 4 places I visualize to relax or for meditating.
            It’s hard to imagine that most people never remember their dreams. Like several of my friends. Something I find hard to comprehend. I can’t always recall my dreams, later on like right now. I can’t quite remember last nights dream. I know I have it stored in my memory. Its sitting there teasing me, just out of reach, but its there and in an hour or two or maybe tomorrow, something will trigger it and I will recall it mostly. I recall the other nights dream- oh there it is, I remember last nights, completely. Some of them I don’t bother to try and remember, but I always want to be able to remember my dreams. They are just-I enjoy dreaming, I really- Really do, sometimes I won’t let myself wake up, so I can continue to dream. That's the real reason I sleep in. I actually wake up rather early, but I go back to sleep so I can dream more. I don't currently have a job, so I don't have a reason to get up. I enjoy dreaming so much that my body can hit REM sleep in record time or I like to think so. I don't know what the record is. I can hit REM within a half hour so I can dream when I take as short nap. Which when that happened the first time I had a dream when taking a short nap, made me ecstatic and it happens most times now.
            I remember my first nightmare, which I don’t really have nightmares maybe 5 in my life so far. The last one I had was when I still worked for Cinemark. I had a dream the popcorn was suffocating me. I hated working in concessions and with the popcorn; it was far too hot next to the popper. I preferred either Ushering or Box Office. But the first nightmare I ever had (or rather can still recall) it was when I was about 5 or 6, judging from the way I looked from behind (it was a third person view) I was wearing a jean jacket and jean pants. (It’s actually interesting to think back on it, how vivid but simple it was, and then thinking of last nights dream and have vivid and complex it was. My dreams have really evolved over my 22 years. But back to this dream) I was dressed in jean clothing, hair pulled into a half pony tail. There was no grass, no sky just a fence. One of those fences that are just has a post every roughly 3 feet with three horizontal posts with about a foot in-between them and it was a dark brown. Something was chasing me. I ran to the fence and tried to climb up it but something grabbed my leg and then I woke up.
            Now if I were to describe say last nights dream, it would be a whole story in of itself with details of what was in the background, to emotions, to the dialoged, to what I was wearing/what I lost, which was a awesome pair of handmade dice earring, that I found later on. There would also be several scenes, that don’t appear to fit together, but of course it wasn’t noticeable at the time. Also the time of year it took place, last night was a few days before 4th of July, which was oddly random and this weird maze like garden. That was breathtaking. To the weird sudden cartoon style it took on for a single frame which I blame Jimmy Fallon for.
(I know how dreams work sorta from the psychology class I took.) Dreams are created from you brain going over what it did the day before to better remember it. Which is why it can be a good idea to study before you go to bed and why those audio tapes work. Those ones that you listen to while you sleep. Its also a great way to manipulate what you will dream about. Doesn’t always work, but its great when it does. So the creative side of your brain will spin a story around what your brain is going over to remember, aka to be a bit scientific*straights reading glasses* Pathways of your memories will fire off randomly from that day as a way for your brain to better cement the connections. Okay not really all that scientific, I could go grab my psychology textbook, but anyways.
Yesterday on twitter I decided to follow Jimmy Fallon, because when I was staying with my dad for a month, I watched his show for the first time and I really enjoyed it. The one with Kermit and Piggy was great. I can reasonably guess that while my brain brushed over the little detail of following him it brought up memories of his show and one of the ones I saw was that one, that actor who played on House… *IMDB’s* Kal Penn. They were talking about Harold & Kumar’s 3D Christmas and the trailer shown was that claymation scene. Also why it probably brought up that particular Episode of Jimmy’s was Kal Penn has been in this season of HIMYM (How I met your mother) I also added Neil Patrick Harris to who I follow on twitter and I just remembered I forgot to hit follow on the official HIMYM twitter page. Oh well, I will do that later.
Speculation, but reasonably logical. Along with this whole weird part I had the involved Star Wars, likely evolved from the image of Anakin I glossed over before I feel asleep last night. *sigh* I went one too many pictures over in the gallery on my iPhone. I have been trying to manipulate a Psych Dream as of late so I was looking at pictures of Shawn and Lassie but I went too far and the last picture I looked at was Anakin. Well trying to get another Psych dream. A few weeks ago, I managed to have a Psych dream where Henry was my dad and I was Shawn, only myself. I was being targeted by this Psycho which the cameo was Gil from CIS -random- but anyways. He was killing all the stupid kids; meaning those who didn’t pass his test he considered too stupid to be allowed to live. There was a lot more to the story and I woke up before I took his actual test. But I considered it a successful dream manipulation. I had fun with Henry as he was trying to help me, but discreetly because he is a cop and if Gil found out that a cop was involved he would get upset. But hell be damned if Henry wasn’t going to help his child. (I plead Dream logic) I wanted a dream with Henry as my dad, because I think Henry Spencer is an amazing father and it seems like it could have been an interesting dream and it was.
But anyways, I swear I will manipulate another Psych dream out of my unconscious, I will!  I used to get many wonderful Doctor Who dreams with 10th Doctor, well one time it was 11th, but I digress, while back when I was re-watching 10th Doctor episodes. Which I should do again. I finished re-watching all of Psych up to ‘In for a Penny’ I am forcing myself not to restart Psych again. >.<# Though I will probably re-watch ‘In for a Penny’ <.<; I forgot to look for the pineapple again. Heh, got distracted by the show and its awesome-ness; but also because everyday needs a dose of Psych.
So to keep myself from popping over to Psych on Netflix’s and starting over at the pilot and working my way to ‘In for a Penny’ I am watching Buffy again, or picking up where I left off several months ago. I had realized that I missed the last 2 seasons of Buffy, which I was appalled at myself for. Since it has been years I started from the beginning and then I got distracted by Doctor Who, then Watching Star Trek: TNG. Which I proceeded to fall for Commander Riker and then Psych. Amusingly I left off just when it was getting to stuff I hadn’t seen. Lol. So I watch 4 episodes last night and I will watch many more today. I have no job at the moment, so I can spend whole days watching things like Psych which I will force myself to take a small break from. *coughbutwatchatleastoneepaday* So I will finish Buffy and by proxy re-watch Angel and also I still need to work on watching all original 26 seasons of Doctor.  I also need to catch myself back up on NCIS. I also will stop blabbering on now, doubtful anyone is still reading at this point.

Side Notes-
            -Follow me on Twitter, because I will tweet every time I post on my blog and I will post a link. Nekodra's Twitter
            -Have fun and toss me writing prompt, I would love the practice. I will credit you for tossing the prompt when I post the resulting story.
            -If you have never seen Psych, and you love comedies or crime shows, I highly recommend it! You can watch the first 5 seasons on Netflix’s, and you can watch the first 4 of 7 episodes of the current season on Hulu. Psych airs on USA on Wednesdays.  
        - Please remember to comment, I want honest opinions that why I am posting my short stories here. I want to improve, get feedback so I can better myself as an writer. I also just want to talk.
        -Also remember unless stated otherwise, these stories and drawings belong to me, I wrote/drew them, please respect that.

                                                ~Nekodra K.D. LaCroix